When I started getting more consistent with Are You Dying, I started to realize how important repetition was. So I started drawing HE all the damn time. I had a lot of fun with em. These are the better ones…
Short and sweet.
I did a lot of these super fast and they sold super fast so I don’t have the best pics of all of them. Here are a few I barely remember lol
Sometimes I just feel out of place. Like I don’t breathe the same air as the people around me. It’s…ugh…
In 2018, I went on tour with The Label Noir and had so much damn fun just creating, performing, and being myself. Also shout outs to California for understanding that weed should be legal and also should be delivered to your front door after being quality controlled.
At our big first show on the tour, my loop machine decided to stop working mid performance… I couldn’t do my song. I was VERY upset and VERY embarrassed.
I ended up singing “Self Control” by Frank Ocean acapella.
I was still UPSET.
Ok so for a while now, I’ve had body issues specifically around my stomach and butt and thighs cuz while I’m a man, I’m dummy THICK. There’s a lot more positive talk about that nowadays, but for YEARS I hated my pouch and my “girl butt.”
Before I went on this trip, I would shop online for swim trunks and I’d always get the big boofy ones with ugly waves or palm trees cuz they would hide my figure. But this time… I went out on a limb. I got the littlest, cute asf, tight booty shorts. I tried them on after the came in the mail and WOW!!! It was a lot, but also… I thought I looked amazing… :)
Fast forward to the tour… because of incredible Label Noir management (shouts to Ursa Major), we had 24 hours in Vegas and a VIP Pool Party Experience. So of course…..it was a perfect time to wear my lil shorts…
I walked down to the pool party in my big boofy shorts (lil shorts underneath) ready to give up at the first sign of discomfort, but after a few mimosas (and finding out we had a couple hundred dollar bar/service stipend…) I unveiled myself.
Not 5 minutes passed out in these little shorts before a man immediately approached me, called me the coolest guy in the pool, and high fived me. I was ecstatic. The compliments kept coming. The drinks too. And an hour later, I was the life of the damn party feeling more love in myself and for my body than I might have ever had before.
I’ve since lost the little belt that comes wit the shorts, and my butt got bigger. But That just means I have to order another pair….! :D
Tours are funny. As much fun as you’re having, you still need to have meetings. People need to be told what’s working and what’s not. How to reach the next level of what they do. When to chill out and when to get up and work harder.
I’m pretty laid back. I have a lot of energy in me, but very rarely do I direct it into a single goal or use it to progress in society. I’m FAR more concerned with growing spiritually and increasing my understanding of the world around me.
That being said, part of our meeting was my lovely friends telling me that while that was a very lovely quality I had there, being responsible and doing the paperwork to be legitimate and paid properly is VERY IMPORTANT.
I took it well…
The other shows we did on the tour went well. Good vibes. Good times. Met some really cool people and had a blast with my friends. It’s good to travel y’all. And honestly, I think I love performing.
I’ve always loved to move and do something, and when I done rehearsed it? Or when I know that I know the equation to it. It comes out different. It comes out clear as day and people really know when you put work into it. It feels good y’all.
And when I feel good, I dance.
It’s just in me.
But it makes me happy.
So I do.
I’m honestly not 100% sure what these were about.
Back then I was just creating… somewhere in between the last blunt and the next one.
I feel like this is representative of that head high and it’s aftermath.
Whatever your stance on marijuana, let me give you some insight to my experience. I feel an immediate connection to the world around me. I am open to the warmth of the Earth. The earth does have it’s own energy. You don’t need to be high to feel it, but it’s definitely more tangible when I am. I commune with that energy. And if I allow myself to really lean into it and share my own aura and reach into the universe, I tend to feel an explosion of sorts. Like my brain just starts firing off on all cylinders… every synapse laughing together at the same time in euphoria.
It’s a beautiful feeling. Not everyone gets it, but I do. And after I hit that level, for a while…life is right in front of me. And I can do what I want with it. And I notice every little bit of it. I’m so CONSCIOUS, and yet I am so SUBCONCIOUS…things make sense. So I write notes to my sober self. To remind him that it still makes sense.
Some of the are drawings.